Lyrics:
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Chorus:
Friggin' 1n the riggin';
Friggin' 1n the riggin';
Friggin' 1n the riggin';
There was fuck all else to do.
Alternate chorus:
Friggin' 1n the riggin';
Wankin' on the plankin',
Masturbatin' on the gratin',
There was fuck all else to do.
Twas on the good ship Venus,
By God you should have seen us,
The figurehead was a whore in bed
And the mast en erected penis.
The captain of the lugger,
He was a filthy little bugger,
Declared unfit to shovel shit
From one scow to another.
The captain's wife was Mabel.
By golly she was able,
She'd fornicate with the second mate
Upon the chartroom table.
The captain's daughter Mary,
Had never lost her cherry.
The men grew bold and offered gold
Now there's no more Virgin Mary.
The captain's daughter Mabel,
Would lay upon a table
And all the crew would come and screw
As oft as they were able.
The first mate's name was Morgan,
By God he was a gorgon!
He'd play from night til down's first light
Upon the captain's organ.
The second mate was Cropper,
Oh Christ he had a whopper:
Twice round the deck, thrice round his neck
And up his bum for a stopper!
The cabin boy was Kipper,
A randy little nipper,
He stuffed his bum with bubblegum
To volcanize the skipper.
The powder boy was Ripper,
A randy little nipper,
He stuffed his ass with broken glass
To circumcise the skipper.
The ship's cook was O'Malley,
He didn't dilly dally.
He shot his bolt with such a jolt
He whitewashed half the galley.
The ship's dog's name was Rover,
We rolled that poor beast over,
And ground and ground that faithful hound
From Tenerife to Dover.
And when we reached our station,
Through skillful navigation,
The ship got sunk, in a wave of spunk,
From too much fornication.
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