Lyrics:
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Now I came home the other night,
Drunk as I could be;
Found a horse in the stable
Where my horse ought to be.
Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife,
Explain this thing to me,
How come that horse in the stable
Where my horse ought to be?
You blind fool, you drunken fool,
Can't you never see?
That's only a milk cow
My granny sent to me.
I've traveled this world over,
A thousand miles or more,
But a saddle on a milk cow
I never did see before.
Well, I came home the other night,
Drunk as I could be;
Found a hat on my hat rack
Where my hat ought to be.
Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife,
Explain this thing to me,
How come that hat's on the hat rack
Where my hat ought to be?
You blind fool, you drunken fool,
Can't you never see?
That's only a milkpail
My granny sent to me.
I've traveled this world over,
A thousand miles or more,
But a sweatband in a milkpail
I never did see before.
Now I came home the other night,
Drunk as I could be;
Found a coat on the coat-rack
Where my coat ought to be.
Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife,
Explain this thing to me,
How come that coat on the coat-rack
Where my coat ought to be?
You blind fool, you drunken fool,
Can't you never see?
That's only a bed quilt
My granny sent to me.
I've traveled this world over,
A thousand miles or more,
But pockets on a bed quilt
I never did see before.
Now I came home the other night,
Drunk as I could be;
Found some boots under my bed
Where my boots ought to be.
Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife,
Explain this thing to me,
How come those boots under my bed
Where my boots ought to be?
You blind fool, you drunken fool,
Can't you never see?
That's only a bed pan
My granny sent to me.
I've traveled this world over,
A thousand miles or more,
But spurs on a bed pan
I never did see before.
Now I came home the other night,
Drunk as I could be;
Found a head on the pillow
Where my head ought to be.
Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife,
Explain this thing to me,
How come that head on the pillow
Where my head ought to be?
You blind fool, you drunken fool,
Can't you never see?
That's only a cabbage
My granny sent to me.
I've traveled this world over,
A thousand miles or more,
But whiskers on a cabbage
I never did see before.
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